"As they say down at the post office, 'here's looking up your address'."

Norm Peterson: Looks like Cupid just shot an arrow through Carla's heart.
Cliff Clavin: When did Carla get a heart?

[plotting how to escape from a mad gunman holding them hostage]
Cliff Clavin: Ah, I got it. How about I sob uncontrollably and lose control of my bodily functions?
Norm Peterson: Cliff, is that a plan?
Cliff Clavin: No, actually it's more of a warning.